it was a shit show
We all have our days. But yours might be on the internet.
it took me about 5 minutes before I knew it was in her ass. i thought the first time would be a bit more special
if by 'bottleservice' you mean 'bringing beers in my purse' then yes, we are.
she's sitting here naked with heels and a taco.
he peed on his own floor last night after we left the bar. pretty much sums up how i feel about the evening
I think he is probably a psycho that will eventually murder me but i mean the sex last time was AWESOME.
Now you know my pain. Live with it. Own it. Recognize it. Cause its like shitting napalm.
I accidentally kneed him in the balls while trying to straddle him so we ended up spending the night watching ffm porn online
i just need to find someone who enjoys eating frozen waffles as much as I do. It will be perfect.
Is it weird that I'm smoking a cig on my back patio in a sports bra and underwear?
the party picked up after I got pretty drunk...I got kicked in the fucking head by a tiny lesbian...she was 5'1" I did not think she could do it...i was very wrong
You went into my bathroom put on my bathrobe.. Said excuse me then went in my front yard and started yelling who ate my whopper..
So I might join you on the drunk train on the way to poor decisions.
Promise me if ever I think I can't do anything, remind me that I waxed my own butthole
I got confused. The music was loud, porn was playing, people were grinding, there were hand jobs.
Randomize
