Just saw a guy at the gas station legitimately dressed in exactly what my costume was last night. Fuck his life.
Dating my ex's drug dealer.. best. revenge. ever.
sometimes you have to go after what you want
true. and i really want to cum
I think I actually have rug burn on my eye.
I'm getting to the point of going up to a guy and saying "Hi I'm maggie and i can put my foot behind my head"... That desperate.
You just want to fuck a girl in a dinosaur costume, don't you?
Last time I sleep with a guy with a penchant to fragrance his dick. Every time I sit to pee, I get a whiff of Axe body spray.
getting up at 8am to start drinking seemed like a much better idea before I had to wake up at 8am
I was wearing my get used bookstore shirt when we fucked. Ironic yet appropriate.
I'm curious as to what my outfit choices drunk me made for this weekend.
I was riding him and in the middle he literally said "fuck yeah, Amy Winehouse"
My face feels like a midget just gave birth to quintuplets
everytime he speaks i want to fuck him less. i just wanna tell him to shut up and take his pants off and we could both be happy.
My breath smells like gin and sadness
Why is everyone giving me a hard time for drinking?!
Your in the library.
Randomize
