why is every porn film shot in the same house? with the same red couch!?!
he chased her out of the bar yelling "TAKE MY VIRGINITY" and i havent seen her since
Think about all of the events that have led to this: me sitting in the back of my classroom drinking beer out of a taco bell cup, telling the teacher I have to leave early to go to an AA meeting.
Walk of shame was bad enough, but farting with each step as I walked past his roommates was just not cosmically fair.
we made malted milkshakes. malt as in malt liqour.
judging by the cake all over the hall, my neighbors had a pretty successful thursday too.
Also, the drinking age in Japan is 20. At what point in the sky am I allowed to start downing alcohol?
If I interpreted our horoscopes correctly...you should be coming home with an 8 ball. Just saying.
Stop treating my vagina like a slapchop.
wtf... you literally introduced yourself as "that friend who's going to fuck all your other friends."
I hope you know that means regardless of their gender.
He handcuffed himself to the keg... D is hooking up with him anyway.
i love how you just walk into that dealer's house every time without knocking, yet you don't even know his name
Alas, I cannot find a male suitor sharing my affinity for sport culture who will both manhandle me and treat me with the respect a young Hillary supporter wants and deserves
Two of us got arrested. Gonna be delayed a bit. Save me a burger.
I woke up under the kitchen table. Andy is cursing out Joe Exotic's name in between heaves in the bathroom. Jay is trying to sleep w/ a shirt tied over his eyes. Lena and Brad braved the sun to go get bloody mary supplies and food. I'd say the Tiger King drinking game was a success.
Randomize
