Hope the move went well! I'll miss you!
you are a cunt and I hated living with you and your skeezy boyfriend.Just thought I'd get that out there.
She said her name was "party"
so Brent and I ordered you a drink then realized you don't live here. I drank it.
a drug dealer just gave me his business card. it had his face on it drinking a 40oz
i think i had a heart attack, prayed, and jizzed my pants.all at once.
She puked her nose ring out of her face.
Just pretend you're riding a unicorn through space. Thats how I deal with the stirrup situation at the gyno office.
You have no idea what this goes for my ego. I literally made you cum in your sleep.
i'm almost positive she was a dude but like it doesn't even matter
re read what you just said
Hey mom, soo do we have a family lawyer or am I on my own for that?
Dougie got over his pride nerves. Found him dancing on a float wearing nothing but rainbow boxers.
Double check your contract and see if it says anything about sleeping with your manager
I started carrying sissors in my purse to open plan B with. Both ashamed and proud.
All I know is I woke up cuddling a jar of peanut butter....
I just got a hug from a random kid in my class. he said I was a champ at the bar last night..someone help me.
Randomize
