you were the other women for BOTH people in the relationship?
she doesn't hate you. She just thinks you need a personality adjustment, speech therapy and weight watchers.
my affection for youporn is starting to get disturbing... i just thought about sending them a christmas card
This kid is drunk.
I hope by "this kid" you mean yourself and not some child you have kidnapped and gotten wasted.
Guy Shares All The ‘New Discoveries’ He’s Made Since Moving In With His Girlfriend And It’s Hilariously Relatable
I just randomly started counting the number of guys that I've hooked up with that are now gay. 11.
i told you he always needs adult supervision he just tazered himself
Should we pre-order food to the ER for cinco de mayo?
Is it bad that my only regret is fucking on the bathroom floor and not the sink?
I had to stop mid sex to take my turn on words with friends so he wouldn't get suspicious. Hookup of the night helped me. We won.
Guy Accidentally Starts A Group Chat With All The Girls He’s Talking To And Gets Absolutely Roasted
I just saw a fat chick ask the bartender to top her corona off with grenandine cuz she has a "sweet tooth" no that's diabetes fatty
We were dancing and she was clawing my stomach like a fat kid getting to a half broken pinata.
I'm pretty sure I did the Macarena with a gay guy while shot gunning a beer
true... I just kept thinking "THAT IS A PENIS. OMG THAT IS A PENIS. DOES HE KNOW IM STARRING? STOP LOOKING. OMG THIS IS AWKWARD. PENISSSSS"
Her mom came in and passed out drunk on the floor next to us while she was riding me, "it's all good, she does this all the time" is what she said
I got very very very high last night and bought a cotton candy machine on eBay
Randomize
