There is a new fb quiz: "are you at ypical woman, future ex or from crazy town" - should i take it?
Aren't all three of those the same though?
Theyre still fighting about whether its called america or the united states.
Why does it say "go to Planned Parenthood tomorrow" on my dry-erase board?
If we have to be apart I understand. Being separated is probably best for our relationship now. I look forward to our booty calls.
Its kinda awkward hearing him say the food taste like ass considering what he did last night.
Nah, I'm just going to keep fucking him until he realizes we're perfect for each other.
don't pay it forward
I eont pay shit forward. told a stranger to call an abulance and peaced
We can Fuck in the shower to save time
And this is why I like you. You're so damn innovative.
Breakfast of champions
Is that a dick crepe?
It is indeed
I think it was clear she was setting us up when she brought me over to you and said "Present!"
I bet, I woke up to you like naked at 4 in the morning shoving a sandwich in your face
I fucking hate tequila. Tequila makes me hate pants.
10/10 would definitely still fuck you dressed as squirrel
He was stoned and starts screaming, "I ain't got but a dollar, I wanna hear waterfalls!". Maybe he can hang with us....
Btw. I have a sinus infection from doing cocaine in a portapotty at a Duran Duran concert. So, gimme a couple of days before y'all start the party.
Randomize
