Ok seriously, can we bring back badminton?
You should really figure out how to get me a picture that will pop up on my phone when you call
Just upload a picture of Bea Arthur. That's what my soul looks like these days
Yeah. He most definitely jizzed himself in the face.
i just made my gag reflex go away.
she thought Martin Luther king was a president at one time. I love knowing I broke up with my ex and this is what he ends up dating.
i've never heard her scream louder than when the koreans scored. what am i lacking in bed?
she broke up with me and one of her excuses was constant soreness... should I be sad or proud?
Apparently, I woke him up at 4AM, and yelled "you're mad because we don't have sex," while grabbing his dick. Then immediately fell back asleep, dick in hand.
I seriously might throw up right now. In class. Sunglasses on. I'm getting too old for this.
It's like leaving me for his wife wasn't enough. He had to give me an STD too.
I'm gonna take off my shirt and spin it around my head like petey Pablo so u can find us
You grabbed my shirt and said, "hope you're not attached" and ripped it off before I could answer you.
I plan to try out my new vibrator and watch Star Trek: The Next Generation. It's a busy night.
I was having a serious heart-to-heart, and then the weed gummy kicked in.
I just had a morning three-some with marijuana and a detachable shower-head
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