you were the other women for BOTH people in the relationship?
he took off my shirt and said 'oh my god the legends are true'
I'm way too drunk on a Sunday to handle this level of Jesus.
Just made a makeshift menthol by rolling a listerine strip into a regular cigarette... Poor? Who, me?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
well when mom kept referring to my "black hole of a vagina" and how i devoured all the nuts at the party like i was a pro, i figured my stay was up.
My prof gave me extra credit for drawing a ninja on my paper and writing "ninja will up my grade"
u r missing out we r watching a tranny direct traffic in a gstring
Want a slice of this weekend's hottest piece of ass?
I respect your roll as DD and there're am required to respect your vehicle
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I had a dream that I had to take a breathalyzer but then it turned out to be a bong....why can't that be real life?
i’m just listening to christina aguilera’s “your body” on repeat and trying not to pass out at my desk.
I'm so high that hamburger just went up my nose. Mustard BURNS
Ive already seen two fights and a clown urinating in the middle of the street. Hello Halloween 2014.
I'm smoking a bowl in my bathtub. I'm meant to be alone.
Yep, you're going to hell.
I take on this great possibility with a beer in one hand and the girl I'm gonna fuck later in the other
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