she pooed on me. she actually pooed on me.
How much would it be to rent out Gus Johnson so he can announce our flip cup games?
THERE IS THE SEXIEST BEARDED MAN HERE. I CAME EVERYWHERE.
He's used the term "balls deep" 3 times in the first hour. Thanks a lot, Plenty of Fish.
Its a "sake bomb in the bathroom during class" kind of day.
The novelty of Nekkid Straight Roommate has faded.
He rubbed my back afterwards. I forgot how to talk and I legitimately thought I was a cat for a few minutes.
It's gay pride, I'm in my EMT uniform getting more girls than your straight ass ever will..
I keep shaking cocoa puffs out of my hair. Best Sunday Funday ever.
I walked into my house with my pants inside out, no shoes and a limp. My mom asked me if I had fun but I passed out before I could reply...
I want to bone him until his eyes fall out
You grabbed my shirt and said, "hope you're not attached" and ripped it off before I could answer you.
He responded to all of my texts prodding for dirty talk with "I will do anything you are comfortable with."\n\nChivalry is great, but being comfortable doesn't get me wet.
You peed in a public fountain and then felt bad so you put dish soap in it; 4 ft tall bubbles.
yeah, but I wanna be the girl that makes him realize he's 100% gay
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