Puking blue powerade in mcdonalds parking lot to the applause of the guy taking out the trash with man in the mirror blasting in the background. Good morning stl
I just saw a like a 30 person deep walk of shame... it was like the million man march but with dorm chicks
oh hey just found a glowstick in my tits. fuck yes new years eve
why is there a clump of hair nailed to my wall?
She's walking around topless with a bottle of red wine, crying and singing showtune ballads. This is actually an improvement.
Saw a guy throw up on himself while walking, drinking, and singing all at the same time. Hope your night is going better than his :)
It was insane. I was drunk for 11 consecutive hours. I woke up covered in almonds and there were footprints all over my shirt
Drunk texting with my high school teacher. This hurricane is bringing out the best in everyone!
U know when u get really drunk and u don't think anyone can see what your doing? If I'm that drunk the possibilities are endless
I would have cried, probably tears of wine, but cried nonetheless.
Though I do have to question why i found you and my brother passed out on his bedroom floor, no clothing between you except his tie wrapped around your dick
I had sex in an engineering office last night. So that could be your life. I was mounted on top of a sketch of a future parking lot for a maintenance building. If that's not romantic, idk what is
He used the term 'cock-staggering' in an email. So needless to say things are going pretty well.
Did you wake up next to Karina?
So that's her name
Tomorrow has nothing to do with the threesome
I am the one with the vagina. I get to call it.
Randomize
