I regularly think about how cool your nickname is
so then she threw up in his asshole
yep..that'll do it.
so..some girl walked up to me on the porch last night. She came to apologize for peeing on our lawn a few days ago. I just looked at her and said it was ok, she wasn't the first.
Yeah but his hole really smells sometimes
my FASA form asked what i spent the majority of my 08 earnings on, im tempted to put "booze, blow, & blunts"
It honestly took me longer to beat Ninja Turtles: Turtles in Time, than it did to have sex with her the first time we met.
No mixer. Vodka in yogurt?
Going through Bojangles drive thru chanting "KFC" hammered at 8:00 was the highlight.
I did my patriotic duty. I woke up next to a veteran this morning.
Yeah last night got weird fast. No lie, a kid pulled a butt-plug with a tail out of his ass.
I love how fuckboys immediately become cultured when I tell them I’m an artist.
can you bring the lube to algebra tomorrow
He just told me I was beautiful, whilst I peed into a cup. If this isn't love I don't know what is.
People probably think I’m a fangirl bc I go to so many shows but it’s really bc I like fucking the tour manager
Just saw Little Red Riding Hood riding a guy on hood of a car
Good for her for committing to the costume
Randomize