i think i have herpe
just one?
i took an adderall last night to write a paper. i ended up watching 7 hours of roseanne and couldn't look away
He just bought a 100-pack of condoms of Amazon. My vagina is already tired.
Mom is telling us about the time she drank her own breast milk. Help.
If I have to go to the hospital can we stop by the liquor store on the way?
omg dinner turned into a foam party this is weiriiid
I fucked my cousin and caught chlamydia this year. I can't really harbour any illusions about myself anymore.
I got picked up after "I just threw up in my face". Then I had very specific instructions involving the bathtub.
CALL 911 HAND IS STUCK IN THE GARBAGE DISPOSAL. HELP
Do we still have any pizza left from last night?
just reached the point where my breast implants paid from themselves in free drinks.
An d I'd rather cry while putting a waffle in my mouth than cry on my pillow, ya feel me?
I'm at a sex party and there's a guy in an ICP jersey and trip pants. I see now that this is the moment in the movie of my life I recognize I have a problem
After she got off the phone with her mom she sprinted down the block screaming "I'M SO GOOD AT BEING A HUMAN!!!!!!!!!!!!!"
i need something from you. video yourself doing naked jumping jacks and send it to me. it will make me smile
Responsible things to do when you're too hungover to get out of bed: Breast self exam.
Randomize
