I molested 6 butterflies tonight
My life would be so much easier if i could just ride around in the cash cab all day
I just rubbed my dick on something in your apartment. Can you guess what?
I need a secretary to manage my drinking schedule.
i seriously have like 9 pictures of people taking shots out of a vag on my camera....
come on down! you are the next contestant on the night is drunk!
THEIR PENISES MATCH. I JUST REALISED THAT. THEY HAVE IDENTICAL DICKS. OH GOD.
I was on all fours trying to empty the bowl we smoked into the sewer when your neighbor came out, but besides that it went smoothly
All I've been thinking about for the past 12 hours is sex and SEAWORLD
Ah. Hot spring. Infinitely less skeevy than a hot tub. These North Carolinian dudes are all class.
He congratulated me by offering up free orgasms.. I told him I also had a birthday last month we needed to celebrate.. He was there in ten minutes.
my god I love twenty year old dicks
I'm covered in bite marks and have a cracked rib - was a good weekend
She handed me scissors and told me that they were the ones with the lowest probability of having been used to trim someone's pubes.
It was kind of like hidden Mickey ears, but with dicks.
Randomize
