He said he was from Mississippi and my vagina clamped shut like a frightened oyster
a hangover this bad deserves a feeding tube
remember the good old days of high school when a half gal would last for more than a nite
my mom just asked me what a queef is. she needs to stop watching south park
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dude...disintegrating condoms. Think about it. For all the guys that wanna go raw dog but their girls won't let them, and for the girls that wanna get pregnant but their guys don't want a kid. What do you think?
I think you've been hitting the soco too hard again.
All we did was argue about ponys and drug dealers
She just told me she blew the waiter in the bathroom. Should I still leave a tip?
She just sent me videos of her blowing my little bro and my best friend... worst. ex. ever.
A total of 95 cents was stuck to my ass the next morning.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I walked in on him fucking my best friend. I think we've reached the point of following each other on twitter.
He went to cum on my stomach and somehow it got behind my ear. He's like a fucking jizz Houdini.
She used my 100 Ways To Cope With Stress handout to wipe puke off her face
It's 90 percent alcohol, and 10 percent a whisper that says "get drunk"
Will u lay on an air mattress with me and drink vodka while we listen to Rick James?
So bottomless mimosas = me waking up in a truck bed in a random neighborhood with no purse or phone or idea how I got there.
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