He just said "Chunky" very loudly in his sleep.
Oh i know my limit. 9 shots after i've given blood.
giving him head while hes talking to his fiancee on the phone about inviting me to their wedding.... im invited. should i go or would that be wrong?
obviously you don't know the college version of myself. if there's something i'm ALWAYS willing to put up for it's alcohol.
I can coach you back to consumption. Think of it kinda like Rocky II.
I think i can hear god laughing at me and yelling "thou shall pay for thy habits of underage drinking" through a megaphone directly at my eardrums
See this is why people shouldn't jump into marriage. See what type of drunk you're engaged to first.
Just bought the plane tickets. Light headed. Blood rush to clit oh god blue clit. Mayday mayday vagina down!
My reasons for going are selfish. She just opened her own law firm. I figure having a lawyer as a friend is a good idea. Nothing in my life suggests I won't need a lawyer again.
Just for future reference, me asking if you're free, followed by a winking face is not my way of suggesting a tandem bike ride.
How much morphine is too much? Keep in mind that I'm going to my graduation dinner with my parents.
I just came inside of a Gatorade bottle. That hungover.
For sure shouldn't do homework after beers and joints. Just cited like 3 sentences at the end with (History, 2013)
Yeah. I couldn't figure out why my toes hurt. Apparently, the guy I was dancing with, kept running them over with his wheelchair.
Two grav bong hits and a shower later and I'm ready for company
It's like you say things that speak to my soul on a deep personal level
Randomize
