the roller ball on my blackberry is the closest i've come to touching a clit in 2 years.
After me and my boyfriend broke up I had to resist the temptation to send a mass text to my booty calls saying "thank you for your patience. it will be rewarded."
just bought a $25 eighth from a chick who has a kid. i'm helping my community out right?
There's 12 honey baked hams in my fridge. I vaguely recalled you organizing a "Midnight Ham Run."
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i literally paused in the middle of it, turned on my light, pointed to the picture netxt to my bed and go "you hooked up with my roommate too!!! AWWW!" he was so weirded out. i don't think he understands the relationship we have..we share..
oh my god, there is an imprint from the nuva ring in the christmas card my mom sent me. merry christmas.
he told me he could still feel the blowjob i gave him last year
wow. THAT good huh
Drowning in science and also vodka. Hope you're having fun.
Church parking lot, park bench, front porch. I think she's more comfortable going down on me in public. May have found the one.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just thought of the perfect gift for mom.... how about not telling her about my fourth open intoxicant ticket I got last night?
Just remember, the Browns have more wins than Ronda Rousey this year.
The last I heard from her she said she was going to plant sunflowers, get drunk on white wine and listen to Everybody Wants to Rule the World on repeat.
She was screaming and crying about how she couldn't find her middle finger. Then, she threw her body on to the pavement. Thats the last time we buy a freshmen a handle.
don't worry, i'll dog sit again, the barking made the sex better, its like he was cheering for us, we were just THAT good.
-367$ and a torn scrotum.. Panama wins
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