I'm trashed wearing your mom's snuggie. She says hello.
dude she wont stop talking about little people big world...she said my penis looked like zach roloff and took a picture with her phone?
Ended up passed out drunk in the neighbors lawn, still in costume. Neighbors thought I was a lawn decoration. Ten points for best Halloween ever.
He was the drug dealer that jumped out of his car to get my number
In case you were unaware playing with rabbits on ecstasy is the greatest thing ever. I feel like I'm ODing on adorable right now.
I feel the need to clarify that I did not show her my vagina.
I thought monday through wednesday was a YOLO free zone.
Hate you missed the after party, I was covered in dish soap gliding bare assed down a slip n slide at 6:30 this morning
Either that or he's gagged in a strangers trunk right now.
Well I suppose either way he's learning a pretty tough lesson right now.
The only joy I have here is being able to shit with the door open.
almost just sent your mom a dick pic. almost.
Just responding to the most professional request I've ever gotten to get shitfaced.
Only in the emergency room do they shut the door when youre laughing too hard
We were trying to organize all the customers to hold a window pickle race. as of 10:37 pm last night we are no longer allowed in our McDonalds.
he said he's going to burn things and pack his stuff. he may leave tomorrow supposedly but i doubt it
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