she calls it her "sourpuss" because everyone makes that face when they see it.
He had a number 3 tattooed on his penis. And when I asked what it meant, he said " you know like dale earnhardt, the intimidator".
Drunk in some girls audi what the fuck is happenin i love sb
it's ELEVEN
thirty
brass monkey on radio. cant stop dancing.
My cousin's wedding had personal beer funnels for each table and a drinking game against the bride and groom. im sorry for ever calling you white trash
Just taught my suite how to queef. I feel like i'm back in 9th grade!
He just said "Chunky" very loudly in his sleep.
is it bad that upon arriving to my fourth sex toy party the sex toy lady instantly recognizes me?
If I'm going to go gay, i'm not going to go for a tiny dick.
My three rules on what I'm wearing tonight. Something short, something see through, and something i had sex in.
I vagually remember taking your birthcontrol and washing it down with ash water
I'm not sure if it was the 11 shots or your naturally vibrant personality but I recall you being quite noisy that evening
Just rolled up a joint with a cop standing right beside me. He just told us to not leave behind any garbage or empties. God I love canadian camping
I'm playing drinking games with a boy who looks like Liam Hemsworth. I think I'm fine.
No matter how long you've been away, there's nothing quite like pooping at your parents' house
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