so this rather large man keeps buying us drinks.......then he licked my face....i dont really care though because the drinks are good. Is this bad?
whats a more ladylike way to say "fuck me on your lunch break"?
craigslist free llama. are you in or are you in?
shes trying to book us all flights to Ireland..I let her get mine and yours but stopped her when she tried booking the guy next to her at the library
Jenny was looking for something soft to drink since it's only noon, she chose spiced rum. Think she might die today
Im covered in vodka and melted gummys. Fuck summer.
This will never work out with him unless I somehow learn how to unhinge my jaw like a python.
They actually said and I quote "it definitely looks like your knees went through some over usage"
I can only only sleep there on nights I orgasm cause he snores so loud and if he leaves me hanging one more time ill probably cut off his dick from lack of sleep and frustration
Well his arms broken so they only cuffed his good wrist to his belt. That's how he cast smacked me in custody.
UGH FUCK THIS TRAFFIC I WANNA SUCK A DICK
You want further proof that God hates me? Okay. We're on the way to the ER. A homeless man stabbed me at the gas station.
you said you didn't feel like drinking anymore so you mixed vodka with your applesauce and ate it
I got drunk. Then I took a shit.
It was a good shit
it will be a surprise...all I can say is stripper clown.
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