I wish you could buy pregnancy test at the liquor store, it's the only place I feel comfortable being a disgrace because I know they understand why it happened...
currently hungover, lying in bed and cutting cheese with my drivers license. ashamed? not even a little bit.
I mean I found and stalk his moms facebook.. that obsessed.
just took my temp. 103. i wonder how tylenol and jager bombs are gonna mix
I hate drunken dyslexia, i thought she said "someone to do" not "something to do" long story short i now have a restraining order.
Im celebrating the fact that the one guy who has ever denied me has just come out of the closet
If i want her back i know all i have to do is sleep with a specific handful of her closest friends. That method is tried and true.
If you can find a Canadian Lesbian to have pity sex with me, let me know.
As long as I don't spend the half the week passed out/fucked up on Klonopin and no one dies, this will be the best week I've had all semester.
Never play truth or dare with a girl who carries a dildo in her purse. I'll never go to a Denny's again.
Yeah probably not. I have a hair appt, a gun class, and hopefully a boy to fuck. I'm booked.
I forgot my backup drink is supposed to be pedialyte and vodka. Add in the shit I'm losing as I drink. Win-Win right?
After we finished having phone sex he proceeded to serenade me with Ave Maria. It was magical.
I impressed him by taking off my panties without removing my pants.
i can believe you didnt get any, i was wing-girling the shit out of him
all you did was repeatedly scream GET IT IN
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