Don't make out with my wife yet
he proposed by singing a showtune... he might as well have had a cock in his mouth at the time
Just a smidgen more estrogen and shed be golden
She's got a legit dose of dude going on
No kidding. All she needs is a cheek full of chewing tobacco and I'd have fucked John wayne.
I opened my door to find him standing there with vodka, McDonalds, a smile and a hard-on. Of course I let him in.
I can't keep up with all the guys you're banging. I'm just going to start referring to them by city of origin.
Lets have the type of night where its 5am and one of us has definitely punched someone who has been on a Disney Channel show.
THINK! exactly how many raw eggs did you color and hide in my apt.
My philosophy is thug life and that means never having to say your sorry for stealing drinks off tables
So after taking my shirt off, he pulls my bra off like a hockey jersey. FUCKIN PRO. Guy knew what he wanted.
Shia just rubbed his beard the way I do all the time and maybe he's my soul sister. This live stream is life changing.
I knew it was Christmas when someone handed me a stocking filled with airplane bottles. Ps just woke up 3 days later
I wore Yonce braids out last night and made out with a man and a woman #bowdown is right
Giiirrrllll. Back to back snaps of dicks. Two different guys sent me their dick at the same time. This is totally what our founding fathers meant with life, liberty, and the pursuit of happiness.
I think everyone at the office can tell I'm dehydrated
you mean still drunk
I've heard it both ways
U just kept yelling her vagina wasn't a priority bc u had a bowl of cheerios calling your name
Randomize
