People in love make me want to vomit
I don't think requesting him as a BBM contact is proper protocol following vomming in his bed.
failed my one goal of the day: wake up before 2 pm.
maybe next time you shouldn't be drinking alone watching intervention at 3 am and no one would think you needed an intervention.
Oh no I havn't even told you about the naked asians yet
i had to wake up at 4 am to do my laundry because I was afraid if I saw people in the laundry room they would judge me by the amount of clothes I had covered in vomit from syllabus week
So I hear you're taking over showing your penis responsibilities now that I'm gone?
Can you imagine how doomed are children are? I mean for one they have our genetics and then we will ruin them as parents. It will be the most magical adventure. Let's not start soon, too many adventures at hand that involve immense amounts of alcohol.
Found a grenade pin. Still no Dave.
Ramen still too hot to eat. Eating it anyway. Stoner girls feel no pain
You thought there were zombies attacking us so you tried to tuck and roll out of a moving vehicle. Also you should consider wearing underwear
I ate mushroom chocolates & went to the botanical gardens for Christmas. HAPPY FUCKING HOLIDAYS
His girlfriend left him for the pizza guy. I am not fucking kidding.
I love you with the passion of a thousand FUCKBOYS during the height of week 1 texting
This is either going to be a hilarious catfish or the fuck trophy of the century.
Randomize
