just took batteries out of my vibrator to play wii guitar hero. think i am gonna regret that move later tonight.
I fell off the front porch last night. Actually.. I dove. I dove off the front porch.
you'd think with how big her nose is she'd have a better smelling pussy..
my secret santa just gave me a pregency test
I went from a chick that didn't like to have sex to one that can't get enough of it. I can't believe I'm going to say this but at 27 I think I need a happy medium
These people keep looking at me like I'm the first person to ever eat ribs in a Home Depot.
There are at least 3.6 billion human cocks in this world. Get some. Get as many as humanly possible. Literally. Do it. 1-2-3 go!
I don't even know where to begin....there's queso sauce and public hair stuck to everything
i vomited out of my nose in three different houses so far, i will be back for my boots tomorrow
she came back from her house with A paper cut , a 2liter of sprite with Bacardi , and half a mustache . we're inviting her more ofte
You peed on a pole and declared to a cop that it was your pole and yelled at him to not even look at it, and then yelled at all of us for looking at it.
He says it takes a lot to subdue the urge to just bury his face in my vagina. Of course, I have absolutely no problem with this.
3 cups of coffee and some molly. The "Tay's Day Off Diet"
Her tits are so fantastic they gave him a panic attack.
You is single now. The world is your ass buffet.
Randomize
