and when i put it inside her she yelled "welcome aboard!"
I cant talk right now they are about to fuck again
I'd like to say he was whispering sweet nothings into my ear all night but really he was just whispering "pussyyy"
She called herself a train and then took off all her clothing. I forget everything after that.
I saw you two flinging Jello at the sidewalk if that helps jog your memory.
So I'm probably the first guy in history to tap out of a blowjob.
my head hurts. i need an adult
and not like a cool parent adult. like a full fledged party pooper grandparent adult
I don't mean to ruin your favorite Disney movie...but...we both came when Mufasa died.
I AM A HOUSE CAT. I CANNOT DO THIS LION BUSINESS WE CALL THE SINGLE LIFE
Face washed and sleeping pill taken. Here's hoping for a more sex filled tomorrow.
It's official. Those are now your come fuck me flipflops
Also fuck yeah conspiracy
I cannot, in good conscience, let you talk to a guy who wears Chaps and a knit beanie
avocado toast wont fix the fact you did a bunch of blow you fucking hipster
So do I get points for screwing my recently single ex boyfriend and then telling him to go fight for his ex back?
you bounced a quarter off my butt and it came back hitting you in the eye. karma, bitch.
Randomize
