Yeah I'm pretty sure at one point I was telling her to keep her dick in her pants. She was going to do some serious damage.
Random question, how's your gag reflex these days
All I remember from last night is puking up a box of cheeze-its and the building catching on fire.
I just remember standing in the shower with you eating chips.
It's hard for me to sext him when the picture i see on my phone when he texts me is his facebook default of him and his girlfriend.
did you seriously make the punch out of vodka and food coloring
we knew you were done when they played It's All Coming Back To Me Now by Celine Dion and you started crying
Party at my house. Beach themed. Clothing optional.
Wouldn't that make it "Nude Beach Themed?"
doing a walk of shame covered in blue food coloring is only embarrassing if you make it embarrassing...actually no its embarrassing on all accounts
This girl invited us back on the promise of weed and strudel...she delivered neither.
I cried at the bar for 30 minutes because I got my arm stuck in my sweater. I got free drinks for the rest of the night after the bartender helped me.
You kept whispering to me that the guy making your burrito was an angel.
I found Erin. She's getting a back massage from the coat check boy and drinking all his whiskey.
Is texting an old booty call with "can you still get your ankles behind your ears?" an appropriate way to reemerge into the singles scene???
I passed out while searching "symptoms of narcolepsy"...
Randomize
