? is bags or t-bags slang for scrotum?
jesus mom
ParTy fuckkin suckkkks bro I gotta fid sum biTch 2 leT me fire sum loadz on her FACE!
?
Nah, but can you imagine if I were seriously like that?
Correction, I've been on a lot of dates and a lot of dicks
I wish i could go to google and type in drug dealers and it would bring up a number, a product and direction
I'm pretty sure I'm almost gay. Like, I'd do it if I had no choice. Like, if i were in prison I'd try it.
So she just apologized to the fire extinguisher.
I hope you don't have to start the day explaining to me how you failed to turn "Can I practice my belly dancing in your apartment" into all night sex.
After a couple hours you decided you were going to walk home but ten minutes later you called and said you'd puked by the side of the road and you needed us to drive you to the art museum.
I'm pretty sure when you walk down Broadway and can pick out people you've slept with.. It might be a problem. I'm leaving for rehab tomorrow.
I want you inside of me and on top of me and under me and behind me
Basically I need you to be like god, just fucking everywhere
I think we got naked. I can't remember but if you have "friends" written on your ass, then we did. Because I have "best" on mine.
I SHOULD NOT BE HAVING AN EXISTENTIAL CRISIS OVER PIZZA
Did you put Dave Matthews band on the playlist? It's really hard to funnel when "Crash Into Me" kicks in.
She kissed me, then said "mmm your face tastes like it needs my pussy on it."
You have cats and a ten year IUD. Embrace it.
Randomize
