The dr is doing well, he randomly asked if I was bi
Jake died.
WTF????????? That's how you tell me????
Oops typo. Jake cried.
There's a hobo dancing by himself. Is anyone going to ask how he got in the house?
Holy fuck. She looks like Vin Diesel's stuntman
There comes a time in a man's life when he's almost thirty he just needs to stop watching Degrassi. This is that time.
the fact that you could barely do more than slur incoherent sentences didn't stop you from correcting her grammar
im probably shirtless right now with a bottle of jack watching horton hears a who. this is a judgement free zone.
i convinced her i need a blow job every morning to wake up because i have a medical condition.
Him cheating on his girlfriend resulted in a $1500 hospital bill from repeated blows to his testicles by my ass. They diagnosed his pain as "testicle trauma". Sex karma at it's finest.
That kid i sell weed to just had his mom give him a ride over here she waited in the car while he bought a bag
NoShamevember. You game?
i think i need to institute a "if your dick has been in my mouth this year i get a xmas present" policy
That would be an interesting position... Not entirely certain how that'd work!
Gravity is no match for my libido
I went on an adventure and now we have more food.
Well, really we just have fire sauce and cookies. But they're edible.
It’s the universal cock block of this decade
FUCK THE COCKBLOCK 19
Randomize
