it was the worst sex ever in the history of sex. i mean ever. and he thought he was great. actually told me he was the best id ever had...what was i supposed to say? lol...i've had better times by myself. seriously.
she calls it her "sourpuss" because everyone makes that face when they see it.
my weekend in 10 words or less: hot friend of a friend, open bar, beach house, sore. In that order too.
so after the bed broke we walked out of the room to a standing ovation
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
His bond is $50,000..margarita Monday might get cancelled
I didn't plan on sleeping with him until he told me his mom is deaf.. Then I felt bad.
When are you not under some influence?
Since last Tuesday...yesterday.
Bruce the cab driver wants to take me on a date to see Taken 2
You looked at me, said I was a nice guy. Then you drunkenly climbed on top of me and said you liked me and wanted me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It feels like the devil is humping my brain with his razor sharp erection.
so much tequila, so little girl.
I was dreaming of a parallel reality and in the dream I just looked up at my present self and was like "you're high, man"
Basically one minute I'm sucking on her nipples and then 45 mins later we're at work and she's my boss.
We just broke up and deleting his dick pics is the hardest thing I've ever had to do.
I just tried to dye my pubic hair teal for her
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