i am a beautiful darrk chocolate womann
honey you're def caucasian
i am a beautiful white cholcllate woman.... Z
Dude ur right that IS what a vagina looks like!
Do everybody a favor and GET LAID MORE.
What's the point in getting all dressed up and going when i'm just gonna throw up on myself by midnight?
He was on Keeping Up with the Kardashians it was like a deed from god to bang him
who has not yet felt my sugrcially enhanced boobs. HurryI am at the bnar and it is 1:15 am
as of this morning I have officially vommed on the highways of 6 different countries. It's a proud moment.
So who won the naked front yard Olympics last night?
Well my tits are spray painted gold & i have what i think r the Olympic rings shaved in my vag !!!!!!!SO its safe to say i won something ....
Jesus Christ I am the crazy cat lady of vibrators
I hooked up with Spider-Man on the hood of Santas car. I kept saying that he could shoot his web at me. Also I found Waldo. Overall good night.
If you can't accept me drawing a Santa hat on your penis then we can't be friends
A German guy asked me to take a bath with him. I can't tell if he's just an eccentric European or a run of the mill creep.
Jamie's fucking a senior citizen and I'm eating chips and salsa in the shower at 2am, so whatever you're doing it can't be worse.
So, I gotta figure when the nurses at the emergency room noticed my new hair cut it means I'm there too often, right?
I just woke up with a pair of handcuffs in my pants, can u explain this?
You know you're getting old when you pick up hot sorority girls at the bar, and they write down their phone number, and under it 'we're great babysitters!'
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