is it bad that i shorted Freddie Mac immediatly after I heard about the CFO?
I just cleaned my sheets and decided to do a black light test. My headboard is a masterpiece.
Moved my bed either I'm a whore or every guy I have ever slept with hid condom wrappers under my bed
he said i'm too pretty to suck penis
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
are any of them hardcore sluts...just absolute worthless human beings? if not the paper wins
you can feel better about your life now. i slept with a guy who has gold teeth
Two questions for you. Did I throw up last night and did we get food or did I dream that..?
No you never threw up but you did force me to take you to wendy's because you wanted "beef and ketchup"
yeah that's what i said...you fucked him and peed on his comforter
yeah well...Like any great yacht, I leave a wake
How was my weekend? I just blew my nose and a gram of coke fell out. My weekend was fantastic.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Sorry I invoked the "everyones getting smacked including myself policy last night"
Why do you hate her?
She's dating the best penis that has ever entered my vagina.....
This Pinterest wedding planning is a good distraction. I'm great at this, my imaginary wedding is beautiful
I forgot to ask you how long you're housesitting. By which I mean how many bones can I get in averaging 2.5 bones per day.
20.
There is absolutely a 0% chance my hips will make it out of this twerking business fully functional
Taking care of a girl who just peed on my floor so tonight is not a good night for sex
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