so we were having anal, both very very drunk when he started shouting his roomates name
mid puke you looked up at me and asked if it was your turn to sing
Are you absolutely against sleeping in your car? Because i've done that before.
My only objective is to get drunk enough to forget the last 364 days.
time for you to cut the loving, understanding, non-judgmental crap and say/do whatever it takes to make sure I never, ever, ever sleep with him again ever
Strip mythology. Everyone wins. Most of all me.
so i woke up at six am and his bathroom was flooded. i think i fucked shit up in my sleep.
Not sure if your roommate speaks German while sleeping, or if she woke up, figured out we were fucking, and used German to swear at us.
Found her grinding on my boss with her tongue down her throat last night. Guess who just got promoted!
maybe i should limp back to therapy...
oh yeah will you also bring home vodka i wanna do shots on the roof
I'm getting paid to get fucked up. How much better could this get?
There's glitter all over his bed from my Pink VS panties... I think I might invest in similar styles as a way of marking my territory just incase.
What the fuck were you guys talking about?
Lube wrestling.
Oh, makes sense.
I would really like it if you guys got out of my bush
Christ, I'm so hungover I pretty positive I sent Luna to school with salsa instead of jelly on her sandwich.
Randomize
