i want to fuck
?
it's pretty self explanatory
2 am we went back to his house. his mom handed us beers and cooked us pancakes. the next morning his dad had washed my car. i lied. living at home after college definitely does not suck.
I mean what are real friends for if they won't hold down your wedding dress to allow for a keg stand
I just reenacted what a cuntadactyl would act like by putting straws in my mouth as teeth and roaring, Plz come get me.
seriously, i am too high for the omelet station to be playing Being For The Benefit Of Mr Kite at 7am
They glued all of the ceiling tiles shut.
oh my god. you caused complete remodeling to a college campus that you don't even go to
This guy needs to come out; I can feel him sucking my dick from across the room.
I'm sitting on our balcony drunk. And in my underwear. Our relationship with our neighbors may improve.
For sure. Gotta go. Building an igloo.
I think I'm crying more because after all these years he never learned to spell you or use a comma properly from me
We don't know where he is but he left his pants and what appears to be a tooth here so he's gotta come back sometime
Because I know nothing is hotter than ocean themed dick pics on SnapChat...
He staggered in with his pants around his ankles and yelled that he lost his pants
he has the ass of a greek god and he made me breakfast
If I get the job, I'm gonna get wasted to celebrate. If I don't get the job, I'm gonna get wasted to forget. Win-Win
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