I have nothing to say, just wanted ur phone to vibrate
i dodnt think we hooked up bcause he actually texted me the next day
I just remember making out with this kid's friend, washing blood off my hands and hearing the RA's were looking for me.
tell your freshman friends. will trade sexual favors for swipes. ive got dinner tomorrow open and lunch on wed
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He put himself in the friend zone by calling me dude all night so I blew his friend. Judge me.
You told me you would ride a pig into the night sky screaming, "I wear my sunglasses at night"
If this nail lady pinches my achilles one more time im kicking her directly in her bedazzled boobs
Gross! What the hell is that?!?
It's quite clearly a man posing erotically with multiple packages of bacon.
I feel like I put a fire out with my hand but idk if that was a dream or not
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I haven't been dieting for my entire life to date some guy who thinks his dad bod is a riot.
Oh man. I am high, watching The Office and getting pancakes. What a country.
I will pay you in sex, beer and popcorn if you will come fold my clothes for me.
Add free use of your panini press and its a deal.
Deal.
wait i saw you last night?
we found you ass naked on the couch covered in pillows.
I love you too, but sadly you're not as good at getting me out of bed as cocaine.
she passed out standing next to the car. her head hit the door so hard the alarm went off. she instantly snapped out of it and started sprinting away
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