YEA!!! I'll throw you a non-baby shower.
Tell her to GTFO!!!!! JAI HO!!!!!
I woke up at 5am and he was watching me sleep... Come get meee!!??
my dad just secretly slid me a nugg in front of my mom. remind me why I moved away for college??
im six kinds of drunk right now
he sent me a naked picture of himself. things got awkward really quickly. but on a positive note he shaved his chest
After I just paid $211 for my hair to be dyed and cut this guy at the bar said "I know you died your hair with koolaid, but I'd still fuck the shit out of you"
Pretty sure I just heard the turkey yell "don't put me in there" as it was going in the oven. way too high for this holiday.
He passed out naked in my bathroom, then took a shower, then passed out again and then took another shower. Last time I let my brother visit.
This message brought to you by inappropriate slogans. Cotton candy, melting in your mouth like boners.
when you're a senior and the freshman guy you wake up next to asks who you are, you DO NOT give him your real name.
Lets both be adults and never talk about last night again.
to answer your questions bluetooth, 30ft, like a tampon, ask her, her idea, got tired of trying to find her in crowed clubs
I am buying anal lube, an enema, and a bag of kit kats. What part of this is compelling the Walgreens woman to tell me to "be well".
I would offer you moral support, but I have questionable morals..
Randomize
