i hate when u poo a lot and when u wipe theres no poopy residue on the TP. it makes me feel like my butt hole is hiding something from me. just had 2tell sum1.
ur penis kinda felt like a vagina to me
I just answered "If only I knew" for a quiz in criminology, she loved it. I got an A
if the best thing you can say about him is "he probably wont kill me" you may want to rethink hanging out with him
I'm sorry. I know you didn't expect me to be arm deep in vagina when you walked through the door.
I am burnt. Have a black eye. Face dove into the grass and got pissed on. Time of my life. God Bless the USA.
When I come over I'm bringing "Socky" the Alcoholism Prevention puppet, today he is going to tell you boys about his FAVORITE word---its called "moderation"
I am currently explaining what double penetration is to the bridesmaid I hooked up with at my cousin's wedding. This is my life.
I need a new pic for your contact id. Because your boobs popping up when I'm having dinner with my grandma or, ya know, when kids have my phone isn't so good.
Dude we both faced 40s of steel reserve which is like saying, "Hey, I'm a complete piece of shit!"
Between this new vagisil cleaner and these cranberry vitamins, my vagina feels like a new women.
Dislocated my knee during sex, popped it back in and kept going. Then got simpathy chipotle out of it too.
I told my fuck buddy that I wanted one of his arms to take home with me to hold onto in bed and he was hurt that I didn't want to bring him, like as a person, home to my family. I feel like you and only you could appreciate this.
woke up this morning and she was gone. but she left a box of donuts on the counter with a note saying "for all the 'o's you gave me last night"
I just made deviled eggs for everyone not passed out. Im officially becoming a drunk chef.
Randomize
