Who goes to Church hungover
Those who weren't lucky enough to go still drunk
ok what kind of idiot turns down casual afternoon sex?
Come on, it shouldn't be that hard NOT to suck someone's dick
Get your penis over here NOW. emergency
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Ok. Here's the plan. Take your hand (whichever is closest), summon all your nerve, and just stick it right down his pants.
I love you.
Her family was right next to mine during christmas eve mass. Between the terrifying glares and her trying to set my sleeve on fire during the candle part I am VERY sure she knows im fucking her ex...
Dude random question. Where you with me when the vulture got electrocuted from the power lines and fell on the sidewalk in front of us?
We are so drunk half our team had to bowl with a chaperone. We won every game. We drink
College has done two things for me. Given me the confidence to blow my nose in public and shit in public
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She throws back shots like they are NO-THING. I swear, she goes through like five straight tequila shots, does a jello shot, chases with half a hot dog, has a rum and coke, and then takes her shirt off and makes an impromptu bandage out of it for fuckin' Tim who cut himself on the flagpole. I'm going to marry her.
I swear, when I turn 21 in four months, I'm going to carry a flask around with me, and make a drinking game out of everything.
You kept ranting how Captain Planet is getting shortchanged in the superhero department. Other than that you kept it together
I threw up in my backpack last night, but at least it wasn't in the pizza box again
I don't know what's worse. The fact that my biological mother is an unwitting bigamist, or the fact that my half sister is trying to seduce my girlfriend.
This is like a walk of shame down memory lane.
Randomize