There are 3 speedbumps now up. Think you can manage the urge to piss on them?
Aw shit! That's like putting me a in a room full of Captiain Crunch Donuts and Jasper Hale and not letting me put my mouth on either.
k, so I just picked a four leaf clover, then saw my dads penis. Lucky? I think not.
The duggars are the reason premarital sex is ok. Because if you don't have it until marriage you have no self control when it happens. And 19 kids.
i'm smoking hookah in a kayak. how did this happen.
you made your cat watch a peta video with you, so you could show it how just how good its life is
I know. She seems like she getting that "need some dick" restlessness. Might explain the feisty attitude
haha she has always seemed a little off. when i met her i was told she was the queen slut. and she had a crown on at the time. it seemed appropriate.
I'll hold a taco with my boobs for you
Most of the bar is playing trivia I'm playing destroy a relationship in twenty questions
Nurse helped me count all my sexual partners and still gave me her phone number. She shall be #73.
I still have a scar from the last time she gave me a handjob. There is NO WAY i'll stick my dick anywhere near her again
Get you some cowboy.
In that sentence you are the cowboy. That is not saying you should get a cowboy for yourself.
Sneaking the vodka in was the easy part.. listening to medley of puking in the porta pottys was not
So what you're saying is that The Magic Kingdom is ruining our plans to get laid?
It's okay that we broke up and all but it's not okay that he still has my Chick-fil-A calendar card. This month is free fries!
Randomize
