wrong asian. never thought that would happen.
some drunk bitch driving a golf cart ran over the live band... its bad.
she just blew up the empty bag of wine and used it as a floatation device.
I don't remember much, but my night is dated pre-Jaeger and post-Jaeger. Also, my boss may or may not have tucked me in.
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I feel like weed makes my smarter. I'm watching the stocks and the way I understand if, do not invest in Yahoo right now because they are not fit for that.
Does Jesus have blonde highlights? Pretty sure I saw him in a lavender shirt and Sperry's.
He carried around a bottle of jäger the whole night and when everyone thought the cops came, he started doing push ups in the middle of the floor cause he said it calmed him down.
On her way to bed she said, "If you have sex on the couch, just move my blanket" Needles to say, we moved the blanket
4 out of 7 roommates in one month isn't that bad if you think about the fact that 3 of them were in the last 24 hours
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She picked me up from the bar in her underwear.
When she saw "buy condoms" on my to do list she figured out pretty quick we were breaking up.
Owwww. A manager/ employee sex scandal that DOES NOT involve me! SCORE!!!
You wanna know what I want to eat? Questionable Mexican food before I go drink. Makes for excitement. Will I puke it up or shit my pants
There's a big difference between a penis and a toilet.
It's next to that place that has cock fighting.
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