Pregnant stripper...not hot.
I wonder sometimes what your vagina thinks about you.
If we're like this now and women reach their sexual peak in their 30's, I can't even fathom what our futures hold.
He asked me why my bellybutton was so ugly... and wondered why i wasnt in the mood anymore.
the ladder is at the bottom of the pool
We simultaneously blacked out then simultaneously came to then simultaneously had sex with the neighbors. We're definitely meant to be roommates.
you were leaning up against the wall pulling your shirt up asking girls to dance on you. your courage to do that is both admirable and frightening.
How big of a disservice to the economy would we be doing if we didn't drink every day holiday break?
I am trying to take a picture of a man in a wheelchair trying to ship a michael jackson portrait
Tell her this is the Disneyland of penises.It's a magical place everyone should visit once in their life.
I think there is a legit party going on the place we thought was AA
I can see the future and your future is full of penis
He sent me nudes and I told him he reminded me of Buffalo Bill.
Mom just walked in with a bag of weed and funyuns. I'll talk to you later.
TYLER OWES ME SO MUCH
I LET A CREEPY MAN I DONT KNOW SUCK ON MY NIPPLES
Randomize
