forget your mom, you can see her anytime. A one night stand only happens ONE night.
well I can't set my house on fire every night
capt morgan doesn't hurt if you honestly believe it's golden flavored kool-aid.
any advancement on the stomach flu vs. pregnancy scare of '10?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
They had half off shots during the fourth quarter. I was powerless.
I could see myself reflected in his wedding band as i was going down on him.
Why isn't there a sort by hair color option on Facebook? It would make stalking much easier.
This has been the most pleasant arrest experience I've ever had.
There's no point in calling it Big Titties Tuesday if girls with big tits don't get anything special
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Would you like to partake in getting high as fuck with your best friend and then proceeding to cry over the shit head guys we deal with?
You peed in my kitchen, while crying and insisting my floor was a toilet.
my sex drive just dried up, fell out, and is rolling on the floor somewhere.
All I want to do is drink an excessive amount of free alcohol bought from strange men, while taking frequent trips to the bathroom to snort an assortment of illicit drugs off dirty toilet seats. Break cannot get here quick enough...
Why did I wake up naked with a leg cramp and and extra $550 in my wallet?
I may or may not have spiked my gatorade to get through a game of monopoly with these children.
Randomize