Oh just a soda. I'm "driving"
You do realize the lyrics aren't "hold me close TONY DANZA" right?
You can't be serious.
So i looked up from her cooch and there was her ex-boyfriend
Awkward
our health teacher's ringtone is Bad Romance and she has a tramp stamp. i will not skip this class, ever.
he urdandictionary'ed 'tease' on his phone and made me read through all the definitions. Am i really that bad?
You slept in the bed with him... with your top off.... and just made out with him....
The last thing i remember was high fiving everyone on the planet.
Three of the best words ever! Cocaine. Research. Study.
We have sex, then we talk about foreign policy. Its a win-win.
i just saw you make out with a girl with facial hair...just thought i would document that in case you forgot
I can't believe I've come to a point in my life where sex for a birthday present is acceptable
My dad lost his bandaid somewhere in the turkey. It was a mixture of thanksgiving and an Easter egg hunt
Apparently mid making out I got up and said "I need to figure out my life" went in the bathroom and threw up for two hours.
If this gives you any indication of my current state, I stopped at Meijer after work and bought funyuns, pregnancy tests and chocolate.
Dude I am a waste of space, I just febreezed myself so I could go out and get lunch
Just don't let me do two things: Beer bongs filled with vodka or shot competitions
Randomize
