The dr is doing well, he randomly asked if I was bi
found some acid from a couple months ago while looking through christmas lights. Looks like santa came early this year.
And i generally try not to roofie people when I'm in a committed relationship.
I have a sudden craving for National Treasure 2. THIS IS WHY DRUGS ARE AWESOME
It's either jizz or frosting, and either way, someone's being held accountable.
composition of my stomach right now: 60% C8H10N4O2 * H2O (coffee), 20% CaCO3 (pepto bismol/tums), 10% HCl (stomach acid), 5% fried rice, 5% residual adderall. i can do that by percent mass too. fuck you finals.
It seems like every guy I've hooked up with all end up hanging out together, its like a cult.
The fun I thought I would be having now when I was six is vastly different from what I am currently doing. Hurraaay sex and vicodin.
According to facebook, I opened up a can of whupass on some douche who poured all the vodka on the ground.
You called the wrong number but I salute you.
I don't know if should be sitting on a toilet or kneeling in front of it
You had 10 drinks. On a first date.
I just masterbated then started bawling.
Running my fingers through my hair was like that scene in Patch Adams where the old lady got to swim in a pool of pasta. I love Molly.
If I had a vagina, my apartment would have been the Atlantic
My vagina is glad I'm back at work because it needs a vacation after working all through my vacation.
Never ever make a tattoo bet. I now have a shamrock on my dick.
Does fucking him in the back of the car with the sun roof retracted count as star gazing?
Randomize
