He still wants to giggity, regardless of his girlfriend. So...I guess I'm happy again.
he made me salute his american flag boxers before i took them off
i'm so desperate for a drink right now i looked up the recipe to make pruno
atleast your grandma didn't give you her USED dildo just so you wouldn't have sex.
I had to fart so bad so i let it go hoping it would be quiet, it was loud and shit came out!!! and i couldnt leave because her parents were behind me
I'm guessing "whatever I can get" wasn't the reply the nurse wanted when asking what med I need. Oh, and asked for a cartoon band-aid.
Waking up in a pool chair wrapped in toilet paper is not what I planned when I agreed to movie night
fucked a girl in Bentley hall at ten tonight, came on the carpet and I plan on doing it in another building soon. Watch where you walk
Literally just had a girl put her street name into my phone. Yeah.
I watched you down those shots like a lion cub watching its mother rip apart a gazelle
I flashed my cleaning lady and don't remember who I went on a date with. I know who I woke up with though, that counts right?
Family trip though. I generally don't wheel too much ass with the fam in tow. Despite the fact my parents would be pleased if I did.
Whose dick am I looking at? There are too many possibilities at the moment.
Is it a bad sign starting the new year off naked, wet, and alone?
Asking for a friend of course
Had phone sex with my boss who I still haven’t seen in person. How’s your Monday ?
Randomize
