It doesn't matter if he doesn't speak English because I speak the international language of blowies.
Whenever I said your name you screamed polo and did another shot.
I can't wait to see her breast feed this thing
he came up my nose again i swear he does this just to piss me off
He had Jail Releases phone number programed into speed dial on his phone.
Shaun got a portable breathalyzer for christmas so now we can tell who the biggest pussy is at the end of the night.
You threw up on yourself, then proceeded to tell us "to not make a mess in your car"
I wonder what my nutrition professor is going to think when I have to put 21 keystone lights, a bottle of merlot wine, and 5 rum and cokes and 4 shots of tequila on my dietary analysis
Do you think royal wedding drunk calls for wine or tequila?
Note to self: You can't deep fry cheese-its.
I will not hesitate to go down on a dick for some cream soda.
The party invite said "this ain't no lame stoplight party, you come to hookup or you don't come" I feel like their honesty deserves out attendance
Not to mention having our pick at the ensuing sausagefest
How do I ask where the Jello shot cups are at Walmart without sounding like white trash?
We were having margaritas and I was saying "back when I was drinking..." They looked all confused. Then I realized "holy shit they think THIS is drinking?"
I thought I came here to hook up, not for a Study Abroad 101 session
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