Made out with some random "plus sized" young lady. She let me kiss her boobies. It was like I was 6 months old again.
It's 3 am and my parents just came up the driveway in a limo. They didn't leave in a limo. I'm scared to even ask.
I think you're asking the wrong person. You don't understand. Like I would fuck the act of fucking itself if I could.
Get here now. This is going to be possibly my most dangerous idea ever, and I'm the guy who challenged a hobo to a breakdance fight.
Guy Shares All The ‘New Discoveries’ He’s Made Since Moving In With His Girlfriend And It’s Hilariously Relatable
yo your bro wants to know what time he got home and were you hosing him off
I'm wearing the jeans from casino night. Tell me why I have a napkin in my pocket that says 'dont fear me'? I'm hoping it was just a coincidence.
nah we got kicked outta the bar after the bouncer saw us putting straws up Chelsea's nose to make her look like a walrus after she fell asleep at the table
It was more like a tour de entire bottle of wine in 14 minutes
We have such limited time together he literally sends me text messages that are like "I sent my roommates on an impossible quest, we have 15 minutes." it's that bad.
Guy Accidentally Starts A Group Chat With All The Girls He’s Talking To And Gets Absolutely Roasted
Just ran into a client at a sex shop. The meeting tomorrow is going to be really awkward as we both try not to picture each other using vibrators or role play costumes.
nana can keg stand better than me. should i be proud?
At a point I was just cumming dust last night
I just remembered touching your bosses wife's fake tits last night. Thanks again for taking me to your work function.
I feel like the first time i have to use my accident insurance its going to be in some sex mishap with you.
Would I do it again? Probably not but still,I don't regret a single ratchet thing I've done in college.