He disabled his match.com account in front of me
In a few years, 50 babies 50 states. Like it?
Had a 3 sum last night, and today food just taste better and the air seems so much fresher!
I'm hiding behind a bush in mens clothing next to a ducks crossing sign. There are joggers. Please hurry.
How much explanation does bbqsexapalooza need?
All i remember before i blacked out is you pointing to a random chick and telling me to bang her for America.
i think i can safely say that is the weirdest thing you've ever propositioned me with. so obviously my answer is yes.
Two people confessed their love to me last night. Drunk is a good color on me
Competitive oral. I'm always telling girls they are only the fourth, maybe third, best blowjob I've had. They go back down with something to prove.
I just want to pat him on the head, bake him some cookies, and reassure him that, someday, he will get laid.
I think we need to stage an Intervention. Her Instagram is a call for help.
My dream date: Hotdogs/nachos from the bar & tequila. Is that too much to ask?
You have talents. You got me laid two weekends in a row in two different cities.
But, if I start dating you brother, I can't talk to you about the sex anymore!! Like... Can we talk about it anonymously?! I just won't use his name.
You know you have a good math teacher when we're talkIng about mixture problems and no one gets it until he explains it by talking about mixing alcohol
Randomize
