i should go to a nude beach and wear just a condom, then ill have tan lines on my dick
Looks like an M-80 went off in a lb. of pastrami
I was just making a list of the girls i have slept with and i can't remember your sisters name
I'm destined to be knocked up by a sailor
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm about to tackle a 10 year old off a sea doo
rethinking that breast reduction surgery... i'm tired of drunkenly explaining the scars to guys who don't really give a shit
My roommate is trying to suck beer out of the rug.
Not going to lie- I'm a little freaked out camping right now. This is one of those high activities you don't do by yourselves...or close to bears
She just mixed her Emergen-C with champagne... Vegas here we come!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We ended up at a lesbian bar and all my co-workers tried to get me laid. This is not how I envisioned coming out.
I WANT PIZZA BUT I ALSO WANT SELF ESTEEM
BUT LIKE WHO AM I TO EVER CARE ABOUT SELF ESTEEM
I need you to be best friend brutally honest about whether or not I can go into public like this.
Apparently I offered the cop my Taco Bell.
Desperate times...
Got drunk tryed walking 12miles to zacks house woke up at noon on baseball park
is it sad that the highlight of my saturday night was waiting till 3 in the morning to hear about your saturday night?
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