Spotted: jayne dropping her cigarettes in a puddle...then picking them back up and putting them in her pocket. If i ever get that desperate, stop talking to me
It's just like soggy cereal, but cancerous
Same, I didn't even get to be tarzan this summer
he just fed my chickens on farmville...i guess that's his way of saying thanks for the sex<3
he literaly had industrial grade plastic underneth his blankets
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I am dressing up to go buy weed. I need to get out more.
she's a kindergarten teacher now. The teacher desks are the perfect height for fucking. I'm delaying the break up a few weeks.
I wish a box of wine came w a hose. It'd be so much easier to drink from.
Bring your friend that fell asleep in the bathroom for my friend.
Middle of vacation, he walked into an audition for a Broadway musical in a drunken stupor. I think he got the part.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Nothing says "Good Morning" like Jell-o shots and coffee cakes.
I just read through our messages from yesterday and realized we both referred to me tearing my penis as a good thing. What the fuck.
guys I just made $20 cause these random south african guys thought I wasn't wearing any underwear
You can't Tinder AND have him bring you icecream in the same night. It messes with your vagina.
I'm happy I peed in your laundry basket last night
poll: am I friendzoned if he just called me brochacha? on one hand, he called me bro, but on the other, he used the a to make it feminine.
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