i take joy in having bigger boobs than others
I imagine the nuva ring like a bug zapper. It just kills them all.
is it bad that I didn't wash the cum out of my hair because it keeps my curls intact?
Stop. He threw up in front of Madison Square Garden security. Spit at the guys feet and grunted ughhh at him.
The more and more I drink I keep rationalizing banging eye patch girl
Y'know, "Class cancelled because Professor is stuck in Mexico," is not something I expected in college. Let alone, "Professor is stuck in Mexico, AGAIN."
Her vagina smelled like pancake batter. That's all you need to know.
I found your doppelganger. same hair, eyes, personality, catch phrases, and penis. it was mind-boggeling.
you stole two subs and a drink from jimmy johns and walked out yelling "get at me bitches"
He would come to class in wrapped in nothing but a pink towel
I spent a good part of the night in a bear hat claiming I'd changed spieces
She's passed out with a slice of pizza between her boobs should I just eat it and leave
I thought since you asked to see my dick I might as well say hi
I volunteer to be the person who breaks into the room and runs around naked and has to be escorted out by police.
Realization: many of my behaviors would lead to me being stoned to death in a lot of foreign countries. God bless America.
Randomize
