Down for casual relationships, more fun than catholic missionary, bring condoms and don't get attached.
so after he got his stomach pumped, he asked for a smoking room.
So I got a little fucked up on the punch, and made out with the family friend. Which is apparently morally reprehensible. I don't get that.
The only person who has seen my penis more than that girl, is that girl's sister.
and i'm pretty sure he drank the lava lamp
theres 5 guys on the side of the road with beads and their shirts off screaming at cars already.
I need a vacation from myself..this is duely noted after I tried giving myself a concussion last night
What the fuck could you be doing in that room to make her yell "Beginners Luck!" over and over again?
He always takes me to get taco bell after we hook up in his car. It's sort of become a booty call tradition.
When my parents ask if I met any nice guys in California, I'm going to answer, "No, but I have gone home with alot of nice girls". Too much, too soon?
He asked if I could ever take him seriously, I told him I just like his doggy style.....needless to say I snuck out after an awkward cuddle session... I wont be calling him at 2 am anymore.
There is a video recording of my birth. I have seen it. It is terrifying.
Go to the bar. Find a girl. Ask if she can cook. Tell her you have a guitar at home. Ask her if she wants to see it. Bring her home. Sleep with her. Tell her it's your birthday in the morning. Enjoy your made with lust breakfast.
at first i said "no rollerblading if I'm going to be drunk," but we all know how that went
We're hate flirting, damnit.
Randomize
